okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
