I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize