is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
