i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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