I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
