I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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