why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize