I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
