I murdered the dance floor call the cops
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize