I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
