i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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