I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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