Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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