I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
