He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
