I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
