VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
