just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
