just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
