this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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