why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I will be naked everywhere
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
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