Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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