It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
