im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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