After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize