Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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