He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
