Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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