The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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