Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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