I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize