My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
