I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
We left an ass print on the piano.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
