Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
