the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.