Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize