So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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