32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
