Screwed.edu
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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