dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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