I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
