This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
