You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize