I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize