You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Even my vagina gasped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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