Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
