just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Randomize
