Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize