Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
