it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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