Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
