With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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